Jan 31, 2012

A Few Things..

1. We celebrated Brayden's six month birthday by having a little "half birthday" celebration.
2. Work has finally given me a somewhat regular schedule leaving it easier for me to make plans and have family time.

3. I've gotten some new hobbies

4. We started going to church

Yes, we had a little half birthday party for our son. Well, it was my idea totally. I got a little cupcake cake, and a balloon, and I bought a lottery ticket for the first time in my life. We let Brayden stare at the cupcake and candles and sang to him. He seemed to love it. We got some really great pictures.

When I started my part time job, I wanted it to be just that. A part time job. I love it there, I really do. But I was working way more than I signed up for. I get to spend good one on one time with Brayden during the day, but not much with all three of us as a family. So now that we've hired a few more people, I'm getting back to working as much as I originally wanted. This has given me more time to plan and have new hobbies.

I started a scrapbook when Brayden was born. I've never done it before so I didn't have any supplies. Now I do, thanks to friends and family and holidays. I found this really great store where you can use their big work spaces and dye cutting tools for scrap booking. I'm going to start spending a few hours a week there in hopes to get this scrapbook caught up!! Brayden and I have also been going to swimming lessons every Tuesday. I feel like I'm finally starting to fall into a normal mommy lifestyle. When we get up in the morning we both have breakfast, maybe play a little, get ready for the day and usually go out and run errands or just walk around. For a long time I felt like we just sat at home way to much.

Zach and I have decided we want to bring Brayden up with a church background. I can't honestly tell you my beliefs or why I really think it's good for us to go, but I enjoy the feeling of community and happiness that the church brings. I think that it will be good for Brayden and when the time comes, he can decide whether he wants to continue with it. My parents brought me up in the church and so did Zach's, so we will do the same. It makes us feel even more like a family. This church near us is like the size of my high school. There are multiple services in the enormous auditorium. The pastors are fun and light hearted and there is a full band on stage. There is also a brunch every Sunday and dinner on Saturday's after the service along with many family activities during the month.

Jan 12, 2012

Drying Up

It's time to let the milk dry up. As emotionally difficult as this is for me, for more than one reason, I think it's time. Our goal from the beginning was to give Brayden breast milk for six months. He will be six months on Saturday.

There are a couple of reasons that I'm stopping. One, I've only been getting about two feedings worth in a 24 hours period for more than a month, which means we've been dipping into our frozen supply. Two, it's a lot of work to keep up with to only get that much milk. Three, starting in February we have a big travel year and it will be a whole lot easier to not have to deal with all that. Anyone who's ever breastfed/pumped knows what I'm talking about. If I was still over producing milk like I was for a good time, I would not be stopping.

It's really difficult to end this relationship with my baby. He loves my milk so much more than formula, so I feel guilty about stopping. Zach keeps reminded me that we've done good by giving him milk for six months. We still have a little bit of frozen milk that we will be using until it's gone. Plus, soon we will be starting him on real food.

I pumped Sunday night when I got home from work, and then on Monday I stopped cold turkey. Since I wasn't getting full ever, I thought that stopping cold turkey wouldn't be so bad. I went the whole day and didn't start feeling any pressure until right before I went to bed. I decided to just throw in some breast pads to catch any leakage and went to bed. Boy was I mistaken!

I slept miserably but tried to fight through it, knowing if I gave in and pumped to relieve pressure that it would only tell my body to keep lactating. Around 2 a.m. I couldn't take the pain anymore and went into the bathroom, leaned over the sink and squeezed until the pain didn't kill anymore (sounds attractive, huh?) Went back to bed, and around 4 a.m. couldn't take the pain again, so I gave in and came downstairs to pump. I pumped about 2 ounces from each side and felt so much relief. I didn't empty and boy was it hard to stop!! But I did. I slept a little better for the rest of the night and didn't pump at all the next day.

I worked until about 11 that night and had to pump again when I got home. This time I pretty much emptied, because I had some isolated sore spots and was afraid of getting mastitis. The next day I had my annual OBGYN appointment and would ask him how I should handle this. He said the fastest way to dry up was to go cold turkey, as painful as it might be. Any sort of stimulation would signal by body to continue producing. But good news (I think?) is that since that last time I pumped, I have not filled up hardly at all. Yes, squishy is goodness.

It can't be that easy, can it? One night of misery?

Jan 4, 2012

Stay at home mommy-hood

Just like everyone always said, being a mom is a full time job. Being a part time stay at home mom and a part time barista is challenging and I find it really difficult to find time for every day things such as errands, cleaning, laundry and just taking care of myself. Part of the problem (I think), is that Brayden sleeps until 8-9 and sometimes even 10 a.m. Like this morning, we both slept until 10 a.m. I don't set an alarm because I just let Brayden wake me every morning. Then from there it's pumping, feeding him and myself, playtime (because he's at his best in the morning), me trying to workout and shower before 2. This doesn't usually happen. It's nearly impossible for me to get out of the house before 1 unless I get up and shower right away and skip everything else except for feeding the baby.

I've decided to take a different approach to stay at home mommy-hood. I'm going to treat it like a job rather than a reason to sleep in and stay in my jammies all day. Brayden will still sleep until whenever he wants and I will get up at 7 everyday and take care of myself so by the time he wakes, I can take care of him and have time to work out at my leisure rather than trying to rush through it in order to get to work or out to run errands. Hopefully this will help me to get more done and not feel like so much of a waste. Also, because I feel like a terrible wife when Zach comes home from work and starts the dishwasher or something. I've been home all day, why didn't I do that? I quite honestly didn't feel like I had the time. But maybe if I got up at the same time everyday I would have more time.

So, that's the plan.